How to hold down a full-time career, get a graduate degree, participate in a social/charity group, and grow a fetus in your uterus all at the same time. The working woman's guide to pregnancy.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Visitors Welcome

Visitation hours are 1pm to 8:30 pm, call or text our cell phone for details.

Mother and child are resting right now after lactation class. Delia successfully fed about three times last night. BM was even able to get a 3 hour chunk of sleep (but I had to pry Delia out of her arms to get to that point).

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

IT'S A GIRL!!!!

Delia Jean was born at 4:41pm EDT. She is a beautiful little thing with a full head of hair. Due to the 2 1/2 week early arrival she weighed in at 6 lbs 13 oz. But she was 19 and 1/4 inches long. Darcy is glowing and sharing a moment with the healthy little one that she carried around for 9 months and pushed out like a champ.

Cheers to all. And thank you all for your kind wishes, support, advice, and generousity that have helped get us to this point.

--BD

These are the days of miracle and wonder

Labor is going along smoothly and much less painful for bm. She is off the pitocin and is progressing quickly.

Just wanted to take a minute to marvel at the times we live in. From the crazy equipment in the hospital, to the fact that bm's parents were called at 4am and able to join us in the hospital before 10am (and they live 1000 miles away), to the ability to post web updates from my phone in the hospital and get feedback from friends, loved ones, and well wishers all over the country.
-BD

In keeping with the birthplan of "get it out"...

Due to the water breaking before the contractions started, BM was given Pitosin to speed along labor (after a water break it needs to come out within 24 hours). Pitosin causes long and very painful contractions. She was in too much pain too early in the process to wait and see what the rest would be like. So she got an epidural. She is doing much better right now and is even getting a little rest.

BD

Full Term

Well BM made it to full term, but just barely. Sunday she was 37 weeks and today at 3:50am her water broke. We're in the hospital right now getting some early labor rest. The nurse says things are going fine. So, with any luck, we will be holding our new baby within 21 hours according to the doctor.

BD

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Feeling Good About Life

I'm just feeling really good, and I thought that I'd share. I really thought I'd be more sore and more tired...more "over it"...than I do at this point. So I thought it'd be nice for y'all to read a "life's just dandy" post on a pregnancy blog since they seem to be so rare.

Today, I wrote a 15-page new business proposal and presented some client work to our firm's board of directors. Yep, that was in one day. Oh yeah, and I stepped out for an hour at noon to have a delicious, expensive, outdoor lunch with my amazing husband. Beautiful weather. And I'm leaving by 6. And I get to go to a PEO meeting (my women's group) which always means a good dinner.

Cletus is happily kicking at my ribs. BD said it would be helpful (not naggy) for me to give him a to-do list. Seriously, life is good.

Is it Procrastination If...?

Last night, I intended to finish paper #3 (already in progress) or start paper #4. Instead, we assembled the pack-n-play, put batteries in all of the baby geegaws, set up the baby monitor, attempted to arrange the downstairs baby room, switched the positions of the crib and the changing table in the nursery, and rubbed lotion on my giant ankles.

Then we got news of Unkie J and Auntie S's friend who gave vaginal, drug-free birth to an 11 lb, 7 oz baby (nope, not a typo). So then there was the time needed to get out the smelling salts and resuscitate me.

So if I'm tackling other things on the to-do list, does it count as procrastination?

Monday, March 26, 2007

Fetal Attraction Contest: Our Guesses

My entry (I think it's a winner!):

Gender: Boy
Arrival Date: April 17
Arrival Time: PM
Weight: 8 lb, 9 oz
Height: 21.5 inches
Hair/No Hair: Hair

BD's entry:

Gender: Girl
Arrival Date: April 15
Arrival Time: PM
Weight: 8 lb, 12 oz
Height: 21 inches
Hair/No Hair: Hair

Registering Today

Today, I'm registering for three graduate school courses for the summer semester. I will happily drop one or two classes if I later determine that I can't handle it.

Thanks for all of the advice and feedback...all of which I've interpreted the following way: do whatever you want to do. And this is what BD and I want to do. :)

Friday, March 23, 2007

Superwoman Complex?

I've had pretty much the same plan in my head since I found out I was pregnant: that I'd stay home with the kidlet during the day while taking graduate school classes at night until I finish my degree.

As you saw on the blog earlier this week, I have been able to arrange this plan with my work.

I got a lot of support for this plan. BD is behind it 100%.

But now that I actually have to enroll in the courses for next semester, people are coming out of the woodwork advising me to reconsider taking classes. These people are all moms, all smart, all accomplished, and they come from my family, school, and work life.

People, I'm already leaving my career. The kid will be about 6 weeks old when I start classes again... over 4 months old during finals. Do I really need to be at home 168 hours every week? Am I really going to be so tired and so frazzled, that I can't handle 6 hours of class-time plus an additional 6 hours of study time a week?

And if your answer to both of these questions are "yes," then I'd love to hear your advice on how I should sell that to my bosses. "Oh by the way, when I said I was coming back in January 2008, it'll probably be more like January 2009... is that okay?"

I know it won't be the easiest route...but I have never taken the easiest route. So, I'd love to get some more feedback: Am I really not the superwoman I seem to think I am?

Three Weeks to Go

This is an update to an earlier post, "Six Weeks to Go"...

Six Weeks to Go
This baby has to stay in until I've (we've) finished:
*five papers (two done; three to go)
*one exam (done!)
*one group project and presentation (started, but still lots to do)
*talking to my colleagues about my maternity leave plans (done!)
*talking to my clients about my maternity leave plans (done!)
*training my replacements (mostly done!)
*organizing and cleaning out my office (uhhh....this one's going to take a while)
*doing our taxes (done! thank you BD!)
*writing our will (next on the list)
*getting edumacated about birthing (done!)
*attending two more baby showers (done!)
*fixing up the house (almost done!)

So when people ask if I'm "just ready to have it out"...the answer is almost ready...just a bit more to get done!

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Guest Blogger: Dreamgirl 3

From Melissa...

"I had a dream last night that your bag got caught in the metro doors, and in pulling it from between the doors, you went into labor. Your water broke all over the metro, and the jerks who hadn't moved in to give you space in the car were quite disappointed in their decision. I wouldn't put too much stock into it though, I also had a dream that I got a $90,000 raise."

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

The Work Situation

I billed this blog as a "working woman's guide to pregnancy"...and yet I've been nearly silent on my maternity leave discussions and plans. This is because I've heard too many stories about people getting fired or in trouble for saying things about their office or employers on their personal blogs. So, I wanted to make sure everything was on the up and up before I took it online.

A bit of background...

I have been working at the same, wonderful public relations firm since 1999. Very few people in PR stay at the same place for a long time (two to three years seems like the average term). I have been incredibly loyal to the firm, because they have been incredibly loyal and supportive of me. I could definitely see myself here for the long-haul.

I also started graduate school (part-time, night class) last June. This decision was supported by my boss.

Then I got pregnant.

Okay, so I have the potential of making a beautiful life collage, using three main elements: motherhood, career, and academia. But am I a talented enough artist to do all three at once? My answer is probably not...and that if I tried I'd probably also be short-changing my roles as a wife and friend.

So I approached my bosses in January about this dilemma, and asked for their reaction to the following plan: that I take a leave of absence when the baby arrives that spans from delivery through the completion of my master's degree. That way I'd be home with the baby during the day and continue taking classes at night. With five courses left (one of which is a thesis), I projected I could return by January or May 2008, depending on my ability to juggle school and new motherhood.

Over the last two months, we have had dozens more conversations about the "plan." In short, they understand what I want (or think I want) to do... but it is inconvenient and undesirable for them. They say.... How about part-time starting in September? What if a big proposal opportunity comes through the door? Can we bid you in? Would you be able to work on an hourly basis on proposals? My answer to all of these questions had to be a "maybe," since I just don't really know what lies ahead.

Our firm's maternity leave policy is four weeks of paid leave with up to two additional weeks where you can use vacation or sick leave. We do not have a policy for leave of absence. So this is why I now have a letter of termination in my file.

So on April 14, I will technically no longer be employed. Anywhere. Weird. Do I worry that I won't be able to get a job back at the firm? No. Not really. But it is weird to think about.

I feel fortunate that I work in PR...in an agency...which has a revolving base of clients and projects anyway. My job changes on a regular basis anyway, so it won't be the biggest deal that it will undoubtedly be different when I get back. New project, new client...probably new team. C'est la vie.

But as great of a firm as it as--and as progressive and friendly my bosses are--this hasn't exactly been the easiest of negotiations. I really feel for the moms who've had to make impossible situations work out, simply because the options aren't there. It goes to show, we still really haven't figured out this "women in the workplace" thing.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Spoiled Rotten- Part Deux

Phew! Today was the fourth of four total baby showers. My office hosted a luncheon for BD and me and showed us some major love. Just in case we were tempted to think we had every baby thing in the world, I got dozens more things I didn't even know about. A couple of highlights: a gift certificate to a home cooked meal delivery company and a onesie that says "Don't wake me; I'll wake you."



On Sunday, my women's group (PEO) hosted a baby shower too. Not only did Cletus get some great loot (including a "Born to Read" shirt and diaper covers--finally!), I got a lot of great advice from moms who've "been there, done that."



Oh, and here's my belly now. Behold!


Help Your Child Accept a New Baby

From Unkie Matt:

"I was waiting for someone to make a pseudo-hilarious joke by sending me this: http://www.wikihow.com/Help-Your-Child-Accept-a-New-Baby , but none yet.

But one thing that struck me...the first picture on the page is weird. Something tells me that these kids are not related at all. One looks like Conan O'Brian and the other looks like Barack Obama. You decide."

Monday, March 19, 2007

Dr. Beautiful

I just got back from my doctor's appointment. They are every week now, which seems excessive, but whatever.

Dr. Beautiful is one of my faves (I've met with her twice now). She's a young, smart, gorgeous African-American doctor who has a really good bedside manner. She counseled me that flexibility is the hallmark of a good birth plan. So, just to wrap up that discussion: my birth plan is indeed to "get the kid out."

Everything looks good with Cletus. Nice size, heart beat, position, etc. Normal and healthy...music to my ears.

Guest Blogger: Dreamgirl 2

From Shanley....

SO! I had a dream last night. You and BD showed up to a baby shower for you with the baby already born. You had gone to NYC to visit everyone and the baby was born there, early (so much for meeting all of your doctors and touring the hospital). It was a girl and she had dark hair. I couldn't make out her name, and you kept giving me fake names that weren't true. So no insights there.

And then, I had another dream later last night that you had the baby and it was a dog. You loved the dog, but I was skeptical because you love cats more. It was a cute dog, black.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

Sick Kitty

Our beloved cat, Krusty, is sick. He seemed fine on Friday morning...by Friday night, he seemed like he was going to die. We got a vet appointment first thing on Saturday morning and, while she didn't have an exact diagnosis, the vet agreed that he is a very sick cat. He's currently on two kinds of drugs and they are still awaiting the results of some of the lab tests.

The reason this is relevant to this blog is that it was a wake-up call for us as to what it means to be responsible for someone else's health. And it's a fine reminder of how things don't always go as planned (I can tell you neither of us were planning on spending our Saturday morning at the vets...and we certainly hadn't planned on dropping $500). Parenting 101...sick kitty style.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

BD Blackberry Test

Following up on Shanley's comment, this is a test from my blackberry to see if we can update the site from anywhere. If you're reading this, it means we will be able to provide periodic (perhaps very sparse) updates from the hospital whenever the time comes.

BD

Drumroll Please..... Auntie Sara's Guest Blog!!!!

First off...I'd like to apologize for the delay on this blog. This term took me by surprise and it was over before I even realized it had really started. And no, I didn't spend it in a drug or alcohol induced stupor, contrary to popular assumption. So, without further ado, here is my blog (though probably not nearly as cool as Bob Loblaw's Law Blog):

I honestly can't believe how fast time has flown. I swear it was just like two months ago that BD and BM called to tell me the news. Time's definitely a-flying. So, it is now just one month to the due date.

It's weird for me to imagine my brother as a dad—or myself as an aunt. Wasn't it just a few years ago that we were sitting together in the living room fighting over the remote control? Okay, so that still happens at Christmas, but you know what I mean.

I'm not going to lie to you people, I'm ridiculously excited about being an aunt! Since I found out about this new little kidlet, I've spent a lot of my free time looking for cool baby things to get it when it's born. I can't tell you how many cool, funky baby clothes I've bookmarked. And I intend to squander most of my remaining financial aid check on such things. That's what aunts are for right? Buying cool stuff and hanging out. I'll have to work on that second one. That's going to be hard for me being in school for the first 2 months or so...but thanks to modern technology I'm sure there will be a picture for every second of that time.

I'm also excited about not being the youngest (insert baby's last name here) anymore! I've always been the baby of the family so...WOO HOO for not being that anymore! :-)
When I think about being an aunt, I think about having fun! So I am really looking forward to being the cool aunt from the other side of the country!

A lot of people have been speculating about the gender of the baby. Most of BD side of the family think it's going to be a boy because of family history. However, I feel that it is going to be a girl. Mainly because BM is such an awesome feminist and if anyone is going to break the genetic cycle it'd be her! Yay for women in the family! Haha, but a boy would be awesome too!

But regardless of gender, It's going to be interesting to see what the next generation of (insert baby's last name here) is going to be like. Granted there are certain things that will inevitably exist because of an apparent genetic predisposition to certain things. So, I thought I would list these (insert baby's last name) certainties here so that no one is surprised about it.
1.) There is no doubt that this kid is going to be politically active
2.) There is no doubt that this kid will become obsessed with the work of Bob Dylan
3.) There is no doubt that one day this kids favorite movies will be The Big Lebowski and Dr. Strangelove.

So in the last month before the kidlet comes into this world, as I finish up papers, projects and capstones, it's nice to just sit back, relax and think about how awesome this kid is going to be and how lucky he/she will be to have such awesome parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles and family friends. I have no doubt in my mind that BD and BM are going to do an awesome job raising the kid.

So, Let the final countdown begin!! (insert Europe song here)

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Baby Safety

In my job (health and safety public relations), I read all sorts of depressing stories about teens killed in car crashes, women suffering from breast cancer, and (today) kids dying in home fires.

The stories today about kids dying in the Bronx fire really struck a chord. As such, we are now registered for an extra smoke alarm, carbon monoxide detector, and emergency escape ladder. Since they don't offer these items at BabiesRUs or GreatBeginnings, I've started a new one at Target.com.

Got to keep the kids safe!

Thinking About Birth Plans

First of all, congrats to blog-reader i and his wife (Mama L) for becoming an uncle and an aunt this past weekend...and welcome baby Justin Christopher!

But in talking to Mama L, I was once again reminded about the potential futility of a birth plan. Mama L's sister wanted a vaginal delivery, but after 15 hours or labor, ended up with a C-section. This is the #1 delivery scenario I have heard from the real, actual people I know who've given birth in recent years. And it seems like the one that absolutely sucks the most.

I will ask my OB about ways to avoid this scenario. Does anyone else have thoughts on the subject?

March Madness

Just a reminder to fill out the "Baby Bracket" if you haven't already done so:

http://fetalattraction.blogspot.com/2007/02/its-game-time-go.html

Monday, March 12, 2007

Boy or Girl? 38 Fun Ways to Guess Your Baby's Sex

From iVillage:

http://parenting.ivillage.com/pregnancy/pbabyprep/0,,j012,00.html

Going through each of the points...I gotta say I think I'm going to have a boy-girl. What do y'all think, using these old wives tale short cuts?

Dr. Pregnant

Just got back from my 35-week appointment. All continues to be well. And while I think I've gained too much weight, I still opted to stop and get a chocolate milkshake from Potbelly's on the way to the appointment. But the doctor's not complaining.

So I've almost done rotating through all of the doctors at the practice (only one more to go). Today, I met with Dr. Pregnant. She is due the week after me. As much as I liked her, she will probably not be the one delivering our baby. For obvious reasons. BD did point out the sitcom possibilities of a doctor who goes into labor while delivering a baby. I can already hear the laugh track.

I asked Dr. Pregnant if she can tell how Cletus is positioned. I was thrilled when she basically described the picture I had in my mind: head down, butt up halfway between my belly button and the top of the bump, and limbs pushing out on my right side. This also makes me happy because head down now + big baby = not likely to move and become breech.

And how come I've had so much practice peeing in cups over the last eight months, and I still have yet to master the skill?

Love this Article

Thinking about maternity leave....

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/03/10/AR2007031000081.html

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Getting Edumacated

BD and I just got back from our marathon childbirth education class. It had it all--breathing exercises on the floor, play by plays of the various stages of labor, the pros and cons of the various drugs and pain management techniques, and, of course, the movie.

The teacher was a former Lamaze trainer and lactation consultant, so she definitely focused on the natural techniques. But she also did a nice job of outlining all of the options and discussed some scenarios when you'd want to go the epidural or narcotic routes. I appreciated her "get all the info you can, but then just see how it goes" approach.

The hospital seems really nice. All of the labor, delivery, and recover rooms are private, as are most of the post-partum rooms. The cafeteria was pretty decent, and there's a kitchen on the same floor as the labor, delivery, and recover rooms (hubbies are encouraged to fetch their own ice chips and snacks and stuff).

I wish I had more to say, but after nine hours of class, I'm pretty zonked.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Motivation

My sister-in-law has been promising me a guest blog entry for months now, but I guess she keeps getting distracted

Maybe she needs some encouragement, some motivation! Please post a comment about how eager you are to see her guest blog entry.

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

You're Getting Sleepy...

Among the blessing that I count on a regular basis, my ability to get a good night sleep is at the top of the list. I've been reading my fellow bloggers' accounts of their aching hips, twitching feet, and painful heartburn that keep them from a good night of shut-eye. Oh my!

Thank you, sleeping gods, for allowing me 10+ hours of sleep each night for the past few nights. Keep up the good work!

Tuesday, March 6, 2007

Scooter if it's a Boy, Libby if it's a Girl

Ha! http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2007/03/06/AR2007030600400.html

Now if he'd only flip on Cheney....

Six Weeks to Go

This baby has to stay in until I've (we've) finished:

*five papers
*one exam
*one group project and presentation
*talking to my colleagues about my maternity leave plans
*talking to my clients about my maternity leave plans
*training my replacements
*organizing and cleaning out my office
*doing our taxes
*writing our will
*getting edumacated about birthing (class on Sunday)
*attending two more baby showers
*fixing up the house

So when people ask if I'm "just ready to have it out"...the answer is No! Stay in, baby!

Monday, March 5, 2007

Sunday, March 4, 2007

Spoiled Rotten

BD, Cletus the Fetus, and I are all spoiled rotten by our friends and family. My DC girlfriends--the aunties--threw us a banging baby shower/cocktail party last night. There was yummy food, cocktails and mocktails, a fun mix of music, and good times all around. We left after midnight. It ruled. Pictures of the party are soon to follow.



Unkie Matt's girflfriend, Joy, had her own nesting instinct today, so she helped us put away all of the gifties and folded and organized all of the adorable baby clothes into our new changing table/dresser. So friggin cute! Thank you, everybody.


Friday, March 2, 2007

Quick Updates

-The "maternity leave plan" letter has been submitted to my bosses. More details to come.

-I'm so ridiculously excited about the baby shower/ cocktail party on Saturday night.

-I'm loving the contest entries, though I'm paranoid about how many of you think I'm going to deliver earlier than my due date! Don't you know I'm banking on a late baby (so I can finish my semester at school)?!

-I'm starting the really tired phase again...very reminiscent of the first trimester. Good thing I have a couch in my office!